Clinton Has Left the Building - Goodbye and Good Riddance
A "Glad to See You Go, Mr. President" Celebration

Well, not everyone is unhappy to see Bill go! There are those of you who can’t wait for the man to “get outta town!” But wait, he isn’t going. He’s the second president in history to take up residence in Washington! Hmmm…

I was researching Bill and his presidential terms when I came across the joke site ClintonJokes.com. A comment on the front page rom a non-Clinton fan from New Jersey says it all:

“How can [his supporters] have the monumental gall, the crust, the nerve to stand by this degenerate, liar, deceiver and yellow-bellied draft-dodger (whew!). They must also have the morals of a barnyard animal. Their reply is the standard liberal tripe, ‘Duh! Everybody does it!’ (Speak for yourself stupid!) And the other gem from the mouths of these pencil-necks, ‘Duh! He’s doing a good job.’ Just what has that 52-year-old juvenile done that is such a good job? Chasing broads around the oval office…?”

So, like I said, obviously not everyone is a Clinton fan. Thus, Party411.com has created this “Good Riddance, Bill!” party in your honor. Go for it.

Invitation:

Monica with a blue dress on?! That’s right. Well, we’ve got it right here for you (click here for a printable PDF (448K), requires Acrobat Reader). All you need is a scissors and to fill in the blanks. If that doesn’t appeal to you, make the invitation of copy of a indictment or subpoena (I’m sure you can find a fill-in-the-blank form on the Internet).

Decorations:

On the front door, put a blow-up of the presidential seal with a circle and a line through it. Underneath the seal, write “Clinton Has Left the Building!”

In the foyer (if you have one), you may want to put some directional signage so that Bill knows where he should go instead of Washington. Use a pole (or coat tree) and cut arrows out of tag board to stick on the pole pointing different directions—“No, Bill, it’s this way to Little Rock!” “Hey Bill, it’s this way to Hillary’s house!” “Bill, it’s this way to the Justice Department…” and others.

Then put some signs around the room. Here are some bumper stickers that I found that make great copy for signs hung here, there and everywhere (the bumper stickers may be readily available at your local novelty store; if so, hang them from the ceiling with fishing line).

President Clinton… “Our Commander in Heat”
President Clinton… “Legalize Perjury”
President Clinton… “Our Fondling Father”

Menu:

Okay, so I think you need a theme, and, at the end of the day, when his foes think about Bill Clinton, they think about impeachment. To that end, I think a “peach” theme would be great. And I found some great recipes! Take a look:

Drinks

• Impeachment Slushes
• Impeachment Smoothies
• Impeachment liqueurs and schnapps!

Salads (from www.samcooks.com)

• Impeachment Melba Mold
• Impeachment Salad

Entrées

• Impeachment coated roast pork loin (from www.our-daily-bread.com)
• Impeachy Pizza (from members.amaonline.com/nrogers/kitchen)

Desserts (from www.our-daily-bread.com)

• Impeachment Cobbler
• Impeachment Pie
• Impeachment Upside Down Cake

Activities

• Joke-a-thon, with jokes like: They are going to put two new faces on Mt. Rushmore. Bill Clinton’s.
• Sing-Along, with songs like this (to the tune of Oscar Mayer Wiener):
     
     His baloney has a first line,
     It’s, “I did not inhale.”
     His baloney has a second line,
     “I can’t help it, I am male.”
     
     Oh, he loves to sling it everyday,
     The White House people all just say...
     
     That Billy Clinton has a way
     Of making BS sound okay.
     
• A Scandal and Probes “Trivia” Contest - Start with but don’t limit yourself to the Whitewater land development case in Arkansas, the Lewinsky case, the White House Travel office firings and the White House’s unauthorized obtaining of FBI files of former Republican officials to name a few. Facts are easily found on the Internet. In fact, you may want to limit yourself to the Monica and Bill travesty since this would be the most entertaining of all the trivia.
• Clinton “Top Ten Denials” List - David Letterman would be proud. Have your friends compete by each writing the top ten things Bill Clinton would deny if he got the chance. Have the five best “authors” present it to the crowd. Good for some great laughs, I am sure. Of course, denials like “I smoked but I didn’t inhale” or “I didn’t have sexual relations with that woman” are so ridiculous they should be excluded before the contest begins.
• Send A Message to Robert - Put up a big mural (white paper available at any craft store) where people can write personal notes to new Independent Counsel Robert Ray about the grand jury he empanelled to consider criminal charges against Mr. Clinton in the Lewinsky case after he leaves office.
• A Mock Trial - Get out your frustration. You’re the host of the party—make yourself the judge and jury!

Favors:

Chocolate cigars? Passes to the Lincoln bedroom (click here for a printable PDF (300K), requires Acrobat Reader)? We can help you with that—Party411.com has designed some just for you!

Oh well, that should do it. Say good-bye and good riddance to Bill. But remember, he’s not going far!

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